” The norm” versus the real

​The world as it is, is so screwed up that we have learned or have been forced to accept uncouth behavior as the norm. And am not talking about morals or morality here. Granted we’ve been brought up from different backgrounds and that certainly has it’s effects on us and how we behave. But, there’s a baseline! There’s generally accepted standards on how one should carry themselves. These standards maybe civil, social, cultural and otherwise. Once someone derails from these basics, they are sure to get frowning and questioning stares from their peers.

I’ve noticed and have experienced a general shift to the left on how relationships are made these days. This observation is solely out of my own experience and the few close friends I interact with daily. Lest it seems like I’m speaking for every woman although I’m more than sure most will identify with me. There’s a growing inexcusable trend of total disregard to the respect that must flourish between two human beings.  We’ve come to accept what men do, especially the uncouth, ill mannered and disrespectful type. Before the whole woman and man or relationship situation even happens, it’s paramount that two people cultivate respect between each other solely because every human deserves to be treated as one and not like a cardboard cutout. You ought to acknowledge the dynamics that is another fellow human. To respect their existence and what they represent. To agree they are another important piece without which the big puzzle called world is incomplete and that you owe them utter respect the same way you’d want someone else to accord it to you. Then comes other parameters. Once this basic is established, you can work your way around the other parameters.

The level of disregard has become so bad that when we finally experience some goodness, honesty and a healthy degree of respect from the opposite sex, we are left astounded and astonished. It is like sighting a rare gem after donkey years of toiling and excavation. It is fast becoming a rare thing to witness. But my questions are, isn’t that really how it’s ought to be? Why does this come as a surprise? Shouldn’t we all be shunning and frowning at the mannerless fellas? Why would you be comfortable settling for someone who behaves like a degenerate and is far from respectful with you? We should be going over and above civility. 

I love that am growing up and finally coming into the woman am meant to be. Not to say, that I’ve always had a firm head on my shoulders. But am happy that there are things that my person just can’t deal with or stand. And here is the simple reason. I know for a fact that I’m extremely respectful of others. That, I’m thoughtful and mindful of others. It matters a lot to me how I make others feel.That, I cherish very much to be treated with the utmost respect as I give it. So there’s just no abso”fucking”lute way I’m going to accept another person to treat me otherwise. If it doesn’t work or suit me, I ship out as fast as my boat can sail out of the dock. I don’t stick around to assume and wait for it to get better because let’s face it, there certain things you just can’t change. Someone has to decide to do that on their own. So know your worth, know what you deserve and above all demand for it, unapologetically!

Xoxo

Fatiha

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